Sea Monkeys Are Still in Consumerist Bondage

In 2013, I wrote a post about the tragic plight of Sea Monkeys: the way western consumerism has exploited these living organism has sickened and offended those of us with social consciousnesses and despite our unsuccessful protest in the spring of 2014, we are still acting in solidarity with Sea Monkey representatives across the world.

And this action is necessary. I was sent, just today, a horrific photo proving that there is still cause for us to stand up for the rights of Sea Monkeys everywhere. I attach it only to show the seriousness of this situation, for the gross depravity represented by this bright packaging is nausiating to say the least:

Does it not send shivers of horror down your vertebrae? The picture of the Sea Monkeys (obviously fabricated) makes them seem content and even happy in their artificial environment. The catch-phrase "Instant Life!" is the worst part of this consumerist plot: it brings our attention to the commodification of these living creatures, and makes it seem exciting! How sick are we???

My friends, we cannot keep this a secret any longer. Sea Monkeys must be liberated. We must bang down the doors of the factories where these poor creatures are vacuum sealed. We must petition our governments to ban such processes that make life, any kind of life, into something that can be bought or sold. We must speak up for the Sea Monkeys, so that in the future, they will speak up for us.